January 2006: As Real And Fake Tears Fall

January 2: An explosion in the Sago coal mine traps 13 miners over a mile underground, with a lone survivor rescued later. It's a predictable consequence of Bush regime's sabotage of oversight, and it won't be the last mining disaster to happen during the regime.

A heartfelt essay about West Virginia and its mining families, "A Question Of Doing What's Right, is way down on this archived page. (It's by Christy Hardin Smith, who posted in those days as Redd Head.)

In January 4 email—

From: Clever Sister
To: Pink
Subject: Too bad this won't happen to pretznit

"CAMP LEJEUNE, North Carolina (AP) ‑‑ A Marine was being held at Camp Lejeune on a charge of desertion for not going to war in Vietnam 40 years ago, a military spokeswoman said Wednesday.
Pvt. Jerry Texiero, 65, was arrested in August in Tarpon Springs, Florida,
and brought to Camp Lejeune on December 14, authorities said...If he's court‑martialed and found guilty of desertion, he could be sentenced to up to three years in the brig at Camp Lejeune..."

His mistakes: (1) Being a "Private;" (2) Not being a "Bush."

The next week, confirmation hearings begin for "Strip Search Sammy" Alito. Following in the path of Mrs. Clarence Thomas, Martha-Ann Alito is reduced to tears over her husband's questioning by mean, bwutal Democwats. Though it's actually Sammy's hearings coach, Lindsey Graham, who spplies the questions that cue Martha-Ann to make with the waterworks. The media fall for it (also on cue, just as always).

In passing news this month, Texas journalist James Moore, who's covered Bush and Rove for years, finds himself on the "no fly" list.

At the office, Cruella—who takes nearly as much vacation as Bush—goes on a cruise next month. I have to pay for the pleasure of her future absence by listening to her now, as she broadcasts her plans to everyone who walks into the room.

One day a visitor listens to the cruise itinerary, then turns to Jesus' Best Administrative Assistant to joke, "And where are you going?"

At first, Jesus' BAA is taken aback by the idea of a vacation—"idle hands," and all that. Then she answers, " I'm going to X-ville tonight, to the adoption agency, for orientation."

It's the first I've heard of this project, but she's soon to become an empty nester, so in need of fresh replacements to mold—"we're not looking for a baby, more like elementary school age'"

When the visitor inquires in a few weeks, Jesus' BAA replies sadly, "The foster parents decided to adopt the twins we wanted." This leaves me room to hope these kids got lucky, though I can see where getting her hands on twins would have doubly amped up some heavenly credits for Jesus' BAA.

And on to the most nagging question about fundies—

From: Clever Sister
To: Pink
Subject: Why don't they all go now!

http://heaventour.org/
"Let us take you on a sneak preview of the sites and events you don't want to miss at the luxurious Kingdom of God"

my favorite ‑ http://heaventour.org/mansion.html

‑Why does it look like the old south? Do I get a slave in heaven?‑cs